I'm trying America. I really am.The more I get out there and speak truth to power, the more I treat you as the adults I really, really want to believe you are, the more ignorant crap gets thrown at me (and you) by the "liberal" media and right wing nutcakes. (That's a mix of nut-jobs & fruitcakes BTW. I'm kinda proud of it.)
Meanwhile the Hillamonster can get away with doublespeak like saying the Michigan primary was fair even though my name wasn't on the ballot (and she STILL barely beat Kucinich & "non-committed") and Senior McCain needs Joe Lieberman to help remind him just who in the hell we're fighting anyways. (McCain - Lieberman anyone?)
Don't get me wrong America, I'm staying strong. I honestly didn't expect anything less (or more) anyway and everything is actually going pretty much as planned. I mean, did you think I wrote yesterday's speech on Monday night?
It's just that I am only human after all, so I suppose it's natural to think of contingency planning. It was in a dark mood like this that I happened upon an interesting idea that I just might pursue if this all blows up in my face after all.
Some dude (bloke?) in Perth, Australia is feeling similar about his life and had the novel (genius) idea of just selling it all on eBay.
That's life as in house, car, motorcycle, stuff, friends, job, even his sky diving and kite surfing gear.
Says he wants to get on a train with his passport and nothing else. I can super size with him.
Now, I wouldn't know how to value "friends" & the job doesn't seem particularly lucrative but the house, car & crap I assume has some value.
Weird? Yeah, but not as strange as the guy who sold his football team "loyalty".
So what I'm thinking is this, I could get WAY more for my life than some kangaroo wrangler down under couldn't I? Damn skippy! Win his auction and you get a crap house in a crap country and a crap job to go with it. You win MY auction on the other hand and you're a United States Senator! That means FREE HEALTH CARE people. Wake up, I'm thinking about this.
Not to mention I gots me a HUGE house, a driver and Secret Service protection. Ok, that last one's not so great but hey they might work harder for you, who knows.
Don't know what I'd do with the wife and kids though...I suppose I'd take em with me. I could always snipe the Aussie's auction with the winnings from mine... Talk about arbitrage! Then I'd be rich AND free. Not bad, I gotta admit.
I definitely couldn't trust eBay with a life of my stature though. I'd have to go through Sotheby's or Christie's and have the whole thing insured by Loyd's of London. I dunno, sounds like a pain.
We'll see how this all plays out but I'm officially floating the idea to see if it drums up any interest. Have an idea? Drop me an email to fauxbama@gmail.com or just send a smoke signal. Hell, along with everything else I must have some Indi..I mean, Native American in me too so I should probably be able to read it.
More on this later, Fauxbama out.
